Barnorama All Fun In The Barn
Let’s hope Ol’ Saint Nick doesn’t take a peek at Pornhub’s Insights page this year, because there’s a shitload of people who will definitely be getting a truckload of coal. And a life coach. And probably a generous amount of holy water.
Every holiday, their team delves into how certain times of the year effect our search patterns, and Christmas is no different. Actually as it turns out, it actually has a pretty profound effect on how we touch ours-ELFs (zing!). Check out the info below.
“While “Christmas” is the most popular seasonal search, “Santa” tops the list of related terms, increasing 447% compared to it’s average level. Other popular searches for the jolly old fella include “santas little helper”, “naughty santa”, “sexy santa”, “black santa” and “bad santa”. This time of the year, he apparently needs some assistance from “santas little helper”, “naughty santas helper” and “santas horny helpers”. Searches for “Christmas present” increase by 665%, and who wouldn’t enjoy unwrapping their very own “dick in a box” — searches for that go up by 570%.”
“Men are 34% more likely to search for Christmas related terms compared to women. Women are 220% more likely to search for “old santa claus” compared to men, and have more of a tendency to search for St. Nick terms like “santa claus”, “santa” and “santa blowjob”. “
“Men are 44% more likely to search for Mrs Claus and women are 121% more likely to search for Santa Claus, but how does the increase in their popular compare leading up to Christmas? Santa is a slightly more popular search outside of the Christmas season, but his searches increase by 374% above on Christmas Day, while Mrs Claus goes up 536% in search popularity.”
“In the United States, traffic drops by -11% on December 24th, but a massive -38% that evening from 6pm to Midnight while people are too busy kissing under the cameltoe to visit Pornhub. On Christmas day, traffic is down an average of -16%.
When we compare hourly traffic to a normal day, there is a +48% increase at 2am on December 24th likely because don’t need to go to work the next day. Traffic drops to nearly half it’s normal level (-45%) at 9pm on Christmas Eve, as people are likely surrounded by their family and friends.”
“On December 24th, traffic drops by -19% in North Dakota, -17% in Oregon and -16% in Michigan. Traffic in Vermont only drops -1% and West Virginia by -4%. On Christmas Day, Utah has the biggest traffic drop of -24%, followed by -23% in the District of Columbia and -22% in Michigan. Once again, Vermont has little change with only a -3% drop on Christmas Day, and -7% in West Virginia.”
“Around the world, we found that Portugal had the biggest 2-day traffic drop of -24%, with a near even drop on December 24th and 25th. The United Kingdom and Australia drop around -20% over 2-days, but far more on Christmas Day compared to Christmas Eve. Poland and Finland are the opposite. Their traffic plummets on December 24th, but only slightly on Christmas Day.”
