Quotes

"One of my friend’s grandfather told him that giraffes have long necks to reach over the zoo wall to eat children."

“I knew I wasn’t going to be a rocket scientist – let’s not be fools – but I wasn’t going to be a bum.”

Now, he is the dude with sign, the owner of one of the most popular Instagram accounts with 7.3 million Instagram followers. His name is Seth Phillips. And his motto is “If you don’t stand for something, you’ll fall for anything.”

"Not being able to wash your clothes until you could do a full, and I mean FULL machine. Getting a stain on a fresh shirt meant scrubbing it with soap over the sink."

"I’m a pretty positive person in general and I love making dumb puns or jokes. Even at my expense I feel like it’ll get a chuckle."

“I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, ‘Where’s the self-help section?’ She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.”

“I once walked into a haircut place without an appointment. As I’m walking in, the lady grabs her pen, looks at the appointment book and says, “and you are?” And I reply, “unexpected”."