29 Unbelievable First-Day Work Disasters

Laugh out loud at these 29 first-day work fails, where things went so wrong that people didn’t make it past their first day on the job.

“A teenage kid got fired on his first day of work at the supermarket for eating all the skin off the rotisserie chickens.”

“I got this. When I was 17 I got a job at Chuck e cheese. I worked the front door and once an hour I had to put on the chucky costume and parade around the place. Here’s the deal with those. Kids are d***s. They kept constantly running up to me and hugging me and punching me in the crotch. After about five hours of this I’d had enough. I purposely didn’t attach the head to the body. It was supposed to button in to place. So after the 20th or so time being Nut checked I had enough. I backed up, did a stupid little dance. Grabbed my head piece and slowly began to twist it around my head. The kids started to freak. Some screamed, some cried. Parents started protesting. The older kids started laughing. The attendant who was with me fell out in laughter. I thought it was hilarious, however the restaurant manager who hired me didn’t think it was that funny. I got ushered out the back door and banned from that particular chuck e cheese. Do I think it was worth it? Hell yes I do”

“I worked in a pizzeria and there was a new driver who was starting. He took his first delivery and when he can back there were no deliveries up so I told him that in between he would have to do dishes and clean. He replied “That’s a woman’s work, I don’t do women’s work”. And…..you’re fired.”

“Not me…but happened when I was working at McDonald’s. New guy came in and when he saw that we were trashing patties if they had been sitting too long, he ate one…then he started just eating them from the supply…dude must have inhaled 10-12 patties over a couple hours after repeatedly being told to stop. Eventually, he started making himself a burger with the buns and eating it as well. Got fired first day on the job.

I’m still convinced he had no real plans of working and just wanted to see how many free burgers he could eat before getting canned.”

“They called me and told me I was let go for not showing up on my first day. Which was a surprise for me since at no point after the interview had I been told that I’d been hired.”

“I got a job at a daycare cooking food. I ended up getting strep throat prior to my first day. They fired me after I told them I couldn’t come in because I was contagious.”

“I was a pizza delivery guy at a family owned Italian restaurant. They brought a guy in to help make pizzas. Two hours into his training he starts talking about wanting to bang the waitresses. The waitresses were the daughters of the owner. The guy teaching him how to make the pizzas was the older brother. He was physically ejected from the building.”

“Super hot girl was hired at Dicks Sporting Goods. She started at 10AM and was fired at 2:30PM along with a guy for banging in the stock room. They both left with smiles on their faces.”

“Janitor job at a hospital, cleaning bathrooms in the patients’ rooms. An old lady laying in her bed called me over and said she was born in Germany and she’d learned to speak English but couldn’t read it very well. She had a get-well card from someone and asked me to read the poem inside. I did. Someone reported me because I wasn’t supposed to “interact with patients.” Got fired before lunch.”

“A guy showed up on his first day, went through orientation, then out for beers with his boss and a few others. His boss was talking about his 16 year old girl and the new guy straight face said “Is she hot?”… this was a 24+ year old dude. His first day was his last.”

“I got hired as an “independent contractor” for some over the phone tech work. Hours were 8am-6pm. Ok, that’s perfect. I go in and get acquainted, start taking calls, and hours go by. I’m wondering when I get lunch. News flash. No lunch, no breaks. Independent contractor or not, pretty sure here in the U.S. you gotta give people some breaks and a lunch at some point in a 10 hour shift. Some kinda law about that I feel sure. So I tell my new boss, look, I’m starving, I’m going to get something to eat, I’ll be back in an hour. He said if you leave, don’t bother coming back. So I left. And never went back.”

“New girl stretched her 1 hour lunch break to 2.5 hours on the very first day. She apologized and said she was shopping and the lines were long. We accepted her apology and told her we hoped the unemployment lines were not as long and showed her the door.”

“Yup, new kid around 19 or 20 comes in (warehouse job) goes out to buy weed during lunch break, gets busted, turns out he has a warrant out for him, goes to jail, then has the balls to call us to bail him out because he lives with his grandmother and she would get upset.”

“Put unleaded gas into a diesel truck.”

“Used to work at a factory that made food stuff. Guy I was trained with fell into a big vat of wet ingredients that was about to be heated up. Had I not looked behind me, he would’ve died.

The boss went to the hospital to tell him he was fired but they were giving him some extra pay in his check.”

“My company hired temps for this big job. We didn’t have a lot of space, so temps had to double up in cubicles. I did feel very bad for them, but some of their actions were hilarious /terrible.

Our laptops require a password to login before doing anything. It’s a gray screen with prompts for the username and password. Pretty simple stuff. One guy had his username and password written on a post-it note. He then spent two hours trying to figure out how to login. He didn’t realize he had to press enter. TWO HOURS!

Another guy was chugging along at his task. His cube mate was sneezing or talking or something. His reaction? Slap her. He got escorted out of the building. The next day, he shows up to work again like nothing happened. He was escorted back out and told to please not return.

Most of the temps were nice and did just fine. Some made you wonder if they would ever get a full time gig.”

“At orientation, they told the twelve of us that we were the bestest and the brightest of 900 or so interviews they’d conducted. We got our access badges and our corporate Amex cards.

One of the “best and the brightest” went to a high-end men’s clothing store on his lunch hour and purchased four thousand dollars worth of suits, ties and shoes.

He came back from lunch and bragged of his exploits. Fired on the spot. He actually thought his Amex card was a job perk. “Can I at least keep the clothes?””

“A high school friend of mine was hired in a pet shop, he got high during his lunch time and when he came back he had some kind of epiphany or whatever, took a look at the iguanas and other lizards, rats and stuff in their cages and decided that it wasn’t right for them to live like this and that they should be set free to live in the wild where they belong so he got them loose and let them free in the wild… streets of the very urban Montreal. Got fired when the manager realized what he did, the manager was absent at the time of my friend’s courageous liberation. Most of the animals probably died and got ran over.”

“I wasn’t fired on the first day, but I saw someone get fired.

I got a job working in a grocery warehouse, driving a forklift in the freezer section. This freezer was supposed to be kept at -20°F, which means they actually kept it a little colder (I once saw it at -46° on a rainy day).

Day one, as I’m getting a brief tour around the place by a rotund middle-management fellow, we see a group emerge from the freezer, one guy in the middle clutching his mouth, tears in his eyes.

Y’know when kids dare each other to stick their tongues onto poles during winter? This guy did that of his own volition, in this incredibly cold room, and had to wait until someone stumbled upon him for rescue.

He was fired on the spot.”

“Door to door sales for an Energy company. Had food poisoning.

Pooped my pants in a clients living room.”

“I worked at a summer camp this big country club near my house had as a head counselor. We had the kids all running around this small aerobics room blowing off steam since it was raining outside. The clock in this aerobics room was broken, so we couldn’t tell the time. I was told by the camp director to take a specific child to her office at exactly 1 pm so they could be given a medication they needed. So I very quickly pulled out my phone, glanced at the time, and put it away. At the end of the day I was pulled into the directors office and told I was being fired because someone reported they saw me using a phone, and the camp had a strict policy about texting while on the job. No chance to explain myself, I was just told I was fired and to leave. I took off my camp shirt, placed it on her desk, said “Have a nice day”, and never looked back. Poetic Justice: That camp went out of business a few months later. A combination of going bankrupt and not being able to find employees. “

“Guy applied for a general manager position at the movie theater I worked at. He got the job based off him having prior manager experience at pizza hut or something. First day he showed up high wearing a “Suns out guns out” tank top and swimming trunk. Also, he was wearing two different shoes. Owner told him to leave promptly after showing up for work that same day.”

“Worked at a Burger King one afternoon when I was 17. About three hours into the shift, a girl I knew from school pulled up to the drive thru window. I ran over to the window and proceeded to lay the mack down on her.

“What’s up girl? How you doin? You need the hookup? I got the hookup. You need some napkins? I got napkins.”

I must have handed her a stack of a hundred napkins and multiple straws. But sensing that she wasn’t impressed by my napkin game, I stepped it up and handed her a toy from the kids menu toy bin. She smiled at me. It was awesome. Seconds later the boss approached me and asked how I was going to pay for the toy I gave away.

He then told me to go home. Returned a week later to pick up a paycheck for $14. Then i wound up spending it all while I was still there on chicken nuggets.”

“Worked for a logistics company that specialized in transport computers. The guy left the depot on his first day, made his first delivery, went to the petrol station to fill up, left the keys in the cab when he went to pay and returned to nothing more than an empty parking spot and bad work references.”

“An ex coworker found a job working with a high end car dealership. Think it was BMW. First day a customer comes in to get tire refills. So they get him to drive the car around back to get the tires done. New guy doesn’t know how a standard works. Drives this car through the front wall of the dealership (all glass wall). Hell of a f**king screw up.”

“I worked at a gas station a while back. Helped train this new guy. He was really nice, we all liked him. 1st solo shift he walks away with $150 out of the register. Didn’t even try to cover it up or anything. Everybody was shocked. Wtf did he think was gonna happen?”

“Had a buddy get hired as a valet in downtown. On his first day he was asked to park a pretty expensive luxury car and ended up hitting it on of the concrete pillars in the parking garage. Pretty much got fired on the spot.”

“I wasn’t there but someone who applied for my design job before me apparently just sat there (probably quietly panicking) for half the day and then left at lunch time. Turns out they couldn’t actually use any of the software they claimed they could and didn’t do anything.

Lots of design jobs give you a little software test first but not all of them.”

“Was 17 and kicked out of school, so I decided to get a job at telemarketing company cold calling people to try to sell them chimney cleaning services, offering the first cleaning for free. It was extremely awkward speaking to those people on the phone and trying to offer something so obscure. So after the first five I just pretended to be speaking to people on the other line while I was actually talking to a dial tone. Did this for about 3 hours. I went to the bathroom, on my way back to my desk the supervisor stopped me and said “Hey, I don’t think that this job is for you” Not sure how they might have known. Looking back I understand why he looked at me funny if I asked I would be paid for the 3 hours that I worked.”

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