26 Movie Things That Actually Never Happen

Women’s hair doesn’t grow on deserted islands, but men’s beards grow really fast.

Viewers noticed this paradox. No matter how many days a girl spends on a deserted island or in the jungle, her legs are always shaved, she doesn’t have any armpit hair, and she looks attractive even without all of the regular beauty procedures.

But men have a lot of facial hair just a few days after they stop shaving, they have this tropical suntan, and they are really dirty. They also start to look as if they were born in the jungle.

Lecturers in colleges never have enough time and they keep talking, even when the students are already leaving.

Have you noticed that teachers in movies never have enough time to finish their lessons? If you see a lecture, the professor is almost bound to be speaking to the student’s backs when they are leaving.

Parents talk to children while crouching.

Psychologists say that when you are on the same level as a child, adults make a more trusting connection. But in real life, not all parents follow this rule. In movies, it seems that adults don’t speak to children in any other way than this.

If rain stars during a funeral, everyone is ready and everyone has identical black umbrellas.

There are many examples: John Wick, It, The Amazing Spider-Man. The Movie, Batman Begins, and many other movies. In real life, not everyone has an umbrella at the right time, let alone identical black umbrellas during a funeral.

Car keys are under the sun visor

Unless, of course, they are in the ignition. People in movies are very trustworthy.

People in a club with loud music can hear each other pretty well.

Movie characters often discuss important business in nightclubs — it seems that loud music is not even a problem for them. And if you’ve ever been to a nightclub, you know that it’s practically impossible to talk there and if you need to talk to someone, you have to scream into their ear.

Characters kissing in bed right after waking up

Ordinary people prefer brushing their teeth, going to the bathroom, or even take a shower before kissing. Movie characters obviously smell like flowers in the morning.

Young people always have money to rent an apartment.

In movies, young people that have just finished college and who work a low-paying job, somehow have enough money to rent a cute apartment in a nice district in New York. Unfortunately, this doesn’t happen often in real life.

In movies about racism, antagonists end up becoming best friends.

Usually in movies about racism, there are 2 completely opposite characters that don’t like each other. They don’t have anything in common, but they are forced to spend a lot of time together: Green Book, Driving Miss Daisy, Men of Honor, Untouchables, The Help.

In movies, they often become best friends, but let’s face it, in reality, they would probably not be friends.

Bullied kids never say anything to their parents.

When good kids in movies are abused by someone stronger than them, they never tell their parents about it. Instead, they try to solve their problems on their own. This is especially strange when really young kids do it.

In real life, bullied kids talk about it to their parents, which is perfectly normal. And the abusers are talked to, and the problems stop. What kind of a movie would this be?

People don’t use a computer mouse.

Hackers in movies type incredibly fast, don’t need a computer mouse, and always say something like “I’m in.”

After moving to a new place, the main character finds a friend.

If a character moves to a new city (to study or to work) they find many new friends right away. Everyone wants to meet them. Unfortunately, it doesn’t work like this in real life.

When someone wakes up after a coma in a hospital, the first thing they do is rip the IV out of their arm.

What else would a person do? Of course, get rid of all the tubes and catheters because they are not important for their health!

When a policeman is close to solving a case, they are suspended but they ignore it.

So, the policeman gives the boss his gun and his badge, but he or she will still find the bad guys.

First, one person starts applauding, and then others join.

This is true for sports movies and also those where someone says something bold, and the people around don’t know how to react until someone starts applauding.

It’s impossible to recognize someone in a mask.

When someone puts on a mask, nobody can recognize them because you need to see the exact spot around the eyes to identify the person. So, the voice, the body, the way the person walks… — nothing matters.

When someone is in a rush, their car won’t start.

Or it won’t open, or the keys fall. So, the character just can’t drive.

You can easily hide in the back seat of a car.

And, of course, the driver doesn’t see anything, gets into the car, starts driving, and then the character appears from the backseat.

Teenagers have huge parties at homes.

And anyone can show up for these parts, even if they don’t know the host. There are guests everywhere, and there are lots of drinks, pizza boxes, loud music, dancing. They sleep everywhere, and there’s always a couple in the parents’ bedroom.

Several people can walk down the street in a line.

We never really walk like this. This is really uncomfortable for other people. Usually, superheroes that have just beaten supervillains walk like this.

People walk out of supermarkets with paper bags that have a French baguette sticking out.

Paper bags and French baguettes are something we’re used to, but there’s still one thing that doesn’t make sense: why is the baguette never wrapped and always touching dirty vegetables and fruits? Does anyone really do that?

High school kids look like 25-year-old fitness champions.

Girls also look older than they should and they mostly look like models. It’s simple: the actors portraying them are often older than 20, or even 30.

Also, did you notice that in movies about the school, there aren’t a lot of boys or girls that are plump (and if there are, they are usually made fun of)? In real life, there are different kids in school, and not many of them have perfect bodies.

People sit up in beds when they have nightmares.

As you probably already know, all of our muscles are paralyzed when we sleep, otherwise, when we have dreams, we would get up and walk around. But still, horror movie characters sit up in their beds when they have bad dreams.

In real life, people need to wake up in order to sit, but when they wake up, they quickly realize that they just had a bad dream and they go back to sleep.

People don’t say “hello” or “goodbye” when they talk on the phone.

By the way, even when they meet each other in person, they don’t always say “hello,” but instead just get straight to the point. It seems as if directors don’t want to spend the screen time on dialogue that doesn’t give any information to the viewers.

Kids always gossip in bathrooms.

Kids often gossip in bathrooms and the people they are discussing are near the sink. Or vice versa.

Bonus

When spies hack someone’s computers, Windows never asks to do an update!