“… his twin sister didn’t show up to their wedding. When questioned about it he said she must have imagined the dozens of stories he had told about his twin sister. He is an only child.”
“… Married 4 years, been together 7 years total, and somehow that came up only a month ago when I asked for the time off a watch during a power outage.”
“… which means she takes forever to clean, which means she hates cleaning, which makes her procrastinate.”