Barnorama All Fun In The Barn
Masters of the Universe
It may have attained cult status, it may be a lot of fun… but that doesn’t mean it’s very good.
Legend
Between baby Tom Cruise and Tim Curry as the devil, this movie is kind of delightful in an utterly bonkers way. It’s also a complete mess.
The Black Cauldron
There are some great visuals but, yeah, there’s a reason it’s one of Disney’s least-watched movies.
Return to Oz
Like Dorothy, you come expecting to return to the magical land of Oz, and end up in an absolute NIGHTMARE world. A lot of these ’80s fantasy movies scarred me for life, but this one was the worst offender.
Excalibur
Helen Mirren! Patrick Stewart! Gabriel Byrne! Ciarán Hinds! Liam Neeson! Excalibur has an incredible cast, and it’s actually a great adaptation of the King Arthur legend – although extremely ’80s (but hey, that’s why we’re here).
Ladyhawke
This movie about star-crossed lovers is so damn romantic, and baby Matthew Broderick is an absolute delight in it. The only reason it’s not ranked higher is because from here on out it’s a very stiff competition.
The Last Unicorn
The Last Unicorn is haunting and beautiful in ways you don’t always get from supposed kids movies. The voice cast is overall really great – but it does lose some points for the terrible singing.
Labyrinth
You were either a Labyrinth kid or a Dark Crystal kid, and while I can acknowledge the many delights of Labyrinth, (especially David Bowie in tights) it doesn’t quite make the top five for me.
The Dark Crystal
Yep, I was a Dark Crystal kid, even though it absolutely terrified me. Even as a (scared) kid, I could recognise the ambition and the wonder of it all.
Willow
Frankly, we don’t talk about Willow enough. The effects might not have aged particularly well but the story is still wonderful. Warwick Davis nails the title role, and look, I would low-key die for Val Kilmer as Madmartigan.
The NeverEnding Story
It’s The NeverEnding Story (ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ahhhhhh). It will forever be magical (and I will forever be messed up by Artax).
The Little Mermaid
From the lows of The Black Cauldron to the extreme highs of The Little Mermaid. It’s still one of the greatest Disney movies of all time, with one of the very best soundtracks.
The Princess Bride
It’s got everything – swordplay, giants, an evil prince, a beautiful princess, and yes, kissing. Don’t even try and name a better movie. It’s inconceivable.